Thinking

I think when I'm really stressed, i tend to drink alot,and i know it's bad for health but though it constraint me from doing that. Still, i can't stop myself from doing that.
Now,i feeling super duper over-strain for the gazillion times which i find it so meaningless. I'm trying to behave properly,talk less sarcastic but it makes no sense. You are who you are, i realize one point. You don't change for the others,it is unfair to yourself.
As i age, i think alot and immense myself in deep-thinking.I want to be success as anyone else out there and always constantly remind myself to give myself three to four year and once i graduated, i will hold a stable income job,drive a car and earn my own state of living.
I don't wish to rely and depend men for a living hood,and that is not me. I won't do that,because it is useless as i thought.(There is no free-lunch in this world)
Perhaps,i think highly of myself or go beyond the expectation i want,because till now, i couldn't find the correct path i want, the right decision i make,maybe i have been contradicting with words and actions recently.
Few years down the road, i don't wish to see myself partying and wasting my life away. Right now, guys aren't my top priority.On rather, making money is the most priority right now.