what is wrong with everything?

Somehow i know i was wrong, but i don't admit it liberally. Somewhat i know i am stubborn and headstrong whereby i don't admit defeat. Then you know, when you try to protect someone beloved or the closest one, you get nothing in return. It's not because i want something in return, it simply the way of protesting the right you achieved for someone. Ultimately, you have been used unknowingly over and over again which is devastating. Sonehow, i'm playing a role of a good guy and it's tiring. A baddie would never feel exhausted using all underhand means to get what they want. Therefore, a bad guy would get what they usually want.
Fuckkkk, i feel as if everything gone wrong and it is not because i wanted to sound i am pessimistic about things around me, it is due to the fact that i trust people too much. I know them rather than i know myself well. What is wrong with the earth? What is wrong with the people globally?

Someday, somehow i find myself not in my usual ways.
I have alot of traumatic dramas through ups and down which i realised i don't love myself as much as i used to be.
I tend to protect myself in one of those ironic situations. i've been through betrayals and fights when people just couldn't get the point that i'm the one who is suffering all those bruises and pain. In my innermost thought, i wish someone would pulled me back to where i belong, to the less grumble one.
I thought i was the chirpy and spontaneous, until today someone told me i was boring. Till then, i realised something has gone wrong in me. In this situation, i can only salvage it, not anyone else.
I becoming more realistic about the world, everything and including myself. I realised that after what i've done, i've been jilted and fooled.

why do you exists when i see you don't

What's your point and what's your worst? In regard of everything, u're just a selfless person with inhuman feelings. Why're you borne and breed in such an attitude whereby I'm so disgusted about it. You blatantly called me and used me to clean up your dirty deets. Call yourself a man or some superficial hero. Ultimately, i doubt so. You're just one of the well-off,with no moral values. You think you could used money to buy everything, including sex. Hero, you are so wrong and i despise you. Seriously, i hate you more than i hate myself, for now.
I am not attempting to teach you anything, at least have self-respect and morality on your own.
Strangers do have magnet of attraction, and also repulsion of hatred and gutless feelings. You do not know how i feel for you. I'd harboured an angst of anger and filled with painstaking sorrows.
One day, you will realised the importance of human-values, just so you know.

when you have one thing in your mind, what would it be

Throughout these whole period of holidays, been partying hard and wild, staying up late researching and resourcing the therapy of sleep resolutions.

I'd have trouble with sleeping and had insomnia, i just can't get to sleep until 5AM. There, i need to find ways to revitalize and rejuvenate my energy before getting to my usual form.

So, yesterday i went to watch sniper with daphne and co. It was a boring movie thou and i gave a rating at 2.5/5.

Then, we went to arab street to chill and relaxing, drink hoegarden which is charmane favourite.

Good-bye!